Productive unmotivation.

So, in an oddly unnatural state, I'm feeling, well dare I say...at peace. And what comes with peace? Well pretty much being ok with how things are. So why then would you want to change anything? Peace brings a lack of motivation.

I was born with an abundance of angst. Always searching and always a sense that I'm somehow adrift far from my home port. This endless searching has always made it a tad difficult to connect with the here and now. so I get scattered, time escapes and I'm always left with little to nothing accomplished except for more angst at being further from where I think I should be.

So, today I feel at ease. With no motivation to search, and create anything new. Yet, somehow without any sense of urgency I have actually managed to get things done. I brutalized the schnoodle by giving him a bath, actually entered some books into my data base, dishes, laundry and vacuuming. For some who might see this list, they're like, "so what, I do that every day". But for me, that's like a months worth.

So why the peace? I don't know. Could be I'm just getting comfy with the new lifestyle. Could be a nice evening out with a good friend last night was ultra relaxing and has carried over. It could be the lo-carb kicking in. (I'm hitting it hard to help with the fungal thing). but one thing is clear, if I continue on my run of non-motivation look out world.